The death of the family dog may be the first experience a child has with mortality. Helping children come to terms with the death of a canine pal calls for honest, sensitive discussions that take into account the individual child's age and emotional and intellectual development.

As a parent, you must decide for yourself how to present this difficult subject to your children, but you may find the following guidelines helpful:

• Explain the cause of the pet's death in terms the child can understand. Emphasize that the death was not anyone's fault.
• When discussing euthanasia, avoid euphemistic explanations such as "Fido will go to sleep." Children may take such a statement literally and worry that if they go to sleep, they too might not wake up.
• If a child (ten or older) understands euthanasia and its consequences, consider letting the child be present at the time of euthanasia if he or she wishes. In any case, discuss the facts with children beforehand and allow them to say good-bye.
• Give children permission to express their grief openly and let them participate in any family ceremony commemorating the pet.

Read books about pet loss with your child. Three titles experts recommend for kids are "When a Pet Dies" by Fred Rogers (G.P. Putnam's Sons); "The Tenth Good Thing About Barney" by Judith Viorst (Macmillan); and "Pet Loss: A Thoughtful Guide for Adults and Children" by Herbert Nieburg (Harper & Row).